Inner Strength Warrior Pillows

Phyllis exercises her demons.

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

Man practising karate is tempted by a glass of beer.

"I came here to get in shape, young man! What does me picking up your bar bill have to do with it?"

"I did seize the day. But then it seized me right back and used some kind of jujitsu move to flip me on my ass."

'Checkmate!'

"Who cares what little kids think? What's important is that you believe in yourself."

"May I remind you that my core worth as a human being remains constant, and isn't tied to external validation."

Minister Starts at a New Church

"Why are they being so mean to us?"

'Food has replaced sex in my life. Now I can't even get into my own pants.'

Arm wrestling champion. (man in wheelchair).

'I think it's time for you to start on your cooling-down exercises.'

"Great. Now I have to worry about my weight."

Anxiety

In these hard economic times, positive self worth trumps negative self worth.

"How come they call these tax returns when I never get any money returned?"

'The Pen Is Mightier...Still.'

"Why do I let everybody walk all over me?'

'Mrs. Zegenzahn, I'm an expert on exorcising demons, devils and poltergeists, but insurance representatives? There's no remedy for that.'

Fighting With Yourself

"I didn't live through a global pandemic just so I could group hug again!"

Lady getting her weight taken and machine exploding under pressure.

'I don't have a shortage of willpower. I have an excess of fairness.'

'I've found this great app. It locates heavier people I can stand next to, making me appear thinner.'

"It's tough sticking to a diet when you're surrounded by temptation."

Woman throwing away smoking accessories

'I'm not sure we should get rid of your cellulite -- it may be all that's holding you together.'

'God, grant me all that I deserve. Amen'

Shame on You.

Hurrah for control pants!

'Hey, most climb over, but whatever works for you.'

Weight lifter straining on toilet

St Louis and his Army Pray (The History of the Crusades).

'Unreal - six days and he's stronger than ever - the guy's an absolute camel!'