Injury Story Collector Pillows

'I went to give a high five - missed the other guy's hand - and hit the rim of the dugout.'

Cricketer battered after facing an over from a fast bowler.

'Is there another doctor in the house? He wants a second opinion.'

'I'm wrapping it tightly to keep the ankle from swelling.'

Thank you to those who never came home and to those who never left their side.

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

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"Thank you for making my decision to fire you, that much easier."

"I love this comedy. What's it called?"

'I don't remember ever having a good memory.'

'Tom's always been the black sheep of the family.'

'Sure we've got a lot of anger. We also got a lot cement.'

"At first I thought it was just coincidence, then I noticed it corresponded perfectly to your shift."

St John's ambulance member "I prefer rugby myself, more blood shed"

'Said he was fixing the ceiling fan. . .'

"You've been traded to the Red Sox for an outfielder with a broken arm."

'I think this fishing injury is more serious than you're letting on!'

'That is one nasty whiplash!'

'Very funny!'

Law Offices: Slip & Trip & Fall formerly Slip & Fall.

"Back in my day there weren't any delivery trucks, distribution centers and fancy computers! We just hopped door-to-door until our feet bled!"

"It's a Plodcast!"

'Hi. I'm Don.'

' You shouldn't believe everything you read in the fairy stories.'

"Grandpa! You have to let me put those under my pillow!"

"Policing's not what it was..."

'We're lucky, really - it could be raining.'

"Oh, and a five and five ones."

Stolen Crime Books.

"She was this tall with curly blonde hair Officer: She ate our porridge and broke our furniture..."

'Should we abstain from sex?'

'He should be okay, it's just a little tap on the head.'

Prompts on the Antiques Roadshow.

"This Bible save a veteran's life during the war."

'This is for a different book.'