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"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."

'Your uncle had a very unusual will.'

'He had but ONE close friend.'

'He took it with him.'

Will Reading.

Cat and dog at a will reading.

'Tiddles has left everything to an old folks' home.'

News Internecine: Murdoch succession battle

"I'm afraid he left everything to charity... Oh, I see. I take it your name's Charity?"

"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."

'Don't worry about making your will, Miss Moneybags leave everything to me. . .'

Contest of wills.

"There's no need for your kitty to be envious. After state and federal taxes and legal administrative fees, Chessy's share of Aunt Martha's estate came to hardly anything."

Alfred Marquez, Probate Attorney - Heir club for men.

"According to his will, he wants his outstanding debts to be shared equally between the three of you."

'Your uncle donated his brain to Harvard and, unfortunately, they used it to figure out a way to get the rest of his money.'

'Someday, Son, all this will be your ex-wife's.'

"I got the cream, but the bulk of the old lady's estate is going to auction."

'And now we come to the sore losers...'

Family Money - "I've been working on your family tree!"

'...And to spare my relatives the burden of inheritance taxes, I've decided not to give them anything.'

'One of these days this will all be yours and by then it should be making a profit.'

'One day, son, all this willy be yours...only by then it will have grown and grown...to hundreds of billions...it's called the cost of PFI.'

Mother and child riding a DNA rollercoaster.

'It seems in the case of the late Little Miss Tuffet, where there's a will there's a whey.'

"Unless you really don't like one of your children, it's best to leave your debt divided equally between them."

God changes His will.

"One day son, all this will probably belong to some little floozy you'll marry."

'And to my no good nephew Milo, who thought he was going to get all my cash - lots of luck!'

"As you all know your dear deceased Aunt Bessie was a very devoted cat lover...."

'...and someday this will all be yours, Son.'

'I hereby leave all my debts and overdrafts to the IRS. . .'

"My father was a very succesful man. He left me enough money that I could marry an idiot."

"When I'm gone all this will be yours son...but I'll be bankrupt by then so you'll probably get nothing!"

'I'll read the will.' - 'I don't like the look of this.'