Infrastructure Consultant Gifts

"Paved in gold? Oh my, no. With out crumbling infrastructure we're doing well if the streets are paved at all."

"Living in a city with functional infrastructure must be so boring."

The Computer Bore

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract."

"As I understand it, after this scaffolding comes down the city will be done."

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

Computer Expert

'Someone's got to do something about these pot-holes!'

'I don't understand. You've wasted the whole interview going on and on about what you know... I think you'd better start telling me who you know.'

'I think what we need now is someone called a computer programmer.'

'This 'infrastructure' stuff you keep talking about -- does it have anything to do with vegetables?'

'Welcome! You are now in Shambles!'

"Neversource"

"Well you said you wanted a simple, cheap solution!" (IT Solutions).

"Someone has hacked into our Computer."

Early Tech Support

HUAWEI 5G

"Is it me, or are these potholes getting worse?"

'Guess they're still fixing the street.'

Bob tried networking – and crashed it.

BMA criticises 'Black Hole' of NHS IT spending

"Having our team all work on the same page has been a lot more difficult since our company has gone paperless."

Terms and conditions

Third Option

Laid off from a dot-com? Ask about our resume-writing software.

'When you've a minute could you design a new health infrastructure for the area with budget forecasts staffing requirements and job descriptions...tomorrow will do.'

"The cost of HS2 was 115 billion, but that was when we started the interview. It's 130 now!"

"Buildings are falling down, roads are crumbling, fuel supplies are hacker. We break for an ad for drugs that will get you through it."

Speed bump in honor of JD Yomp 1866 - 1957...inventor of Asphalt

"So tell me again about the disastrous effects the Biden infrastructure plan will have on the deficit that you're suddenly so concerned about. . ."

US Infrastructure Deteriorating

Water shortage and waste due to leaks

The Mayor Alonzo Q. Furdweiller Pothole. Looks like the mayor and the city council are bickering again.

"Bad news - the local sewage plant is made of reinforced autoclaved aerated concrete."

The Train to Nowhere