Infant Philosopher T-Shirts

"Don't get too attached, everything you cherish will disappear the moment you look away. Nothing you love is permanent."

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

'Does this have anything to do with Einstein's theory of relativity?'

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

"I'll bet all of Albert Einstein's teachers felt like idiots for giving him bad grades too."

'When I grow up, I'm either going to be an authority figure or an unimpeachable source.'

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

"I feel I've outgrown this facility, Mrs. Thompson. Could we see what else is around?"

"Could I ask just one question?"

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

Bless me father, for I have sinned...my brother did it.'

Playdough's The Republic

A kangeroo and it's baby read books about understanding each other.

'This test doesn't understand me.'

"Kindergarten, first grade,second grade, third grade...when do we get to retire?"

"If wisdom comes with age, what are we doing here at eight and a half?"

'Before we start, I'd like legal representation.'

I think I can, I think I can ... therefore I think I am...

'How much stuff can I get away with and still go to heaven?'

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned subsidy of you and Mom?'

"I'm here for the hair."

"Mommy, watch, I'm living authentically!"

'I've been coming to Kindergarten every day for two weeks!-- When do I get paid?'

Philosopher trading cards.

'After you grade my report, may I have my intellectual property back?'

A young positivist.

"I think it's time we learned to stand up for our selves."

"Don't think of this birthday as you're getting older. Think of it as being one day closer to irritable bowel syndrome."

'Young lady, I'm afraid existential despair is no excuse for not eating your lima beans.'

'Yeah, bit how does the stork get into the maternity room?'

"Nicole’s parents celebrated her curious mind, even in those moments when it really depressed them."

"If everything is God's will, tell me again why I need to study for exams?"

"Daddy, instead of the princess story tonight, can you explain how and why manifest destiny eliminated the American Indians?"

"I won't have anything to worry about when I grow up."

'I guess you've noticed that most of these trespasses are reruns.'