Industry Professional Gifts

"Our operations here close down today, and you are all emeritus!"

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

Pounding speeds up the computer.

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

"My email is down... talk to me."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

'The check is in the email attachment.'

'Let's not go by the book.'

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

Killer Executive Suits.

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

"Peter's Joint Head of Communications."

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

"Greetings, I'm the bluebird of dank memes."

The Computer Bore

Online form - Submit.

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

"In recognition of last month's little upward blip, I suggest we allow ourselves a spontaneous victory fist bump."

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

'My name's Google and I'm being inundated with requests for information about every damn thing imaginable, by people I don't even know...It's endless!'

UK/US Free Trade Deal

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

"'Quid pro quo' is a no-no, Bradbury. Around here we say 'reciprocal altruism'."