Industry Professional Gifts

"Our operations here close down today, and you are all emeritus!"

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

Pounding speeds up the computer.

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

"My email is down... talk to me."

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

'The check is in the email attachment.'

'Let's not go by the book.'

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

Killer Executive Suits.

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

The Computer Bore

"Greetings, I'm the bluebird of dank memes."

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

Online form - Submit.

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

UK/US Free Trade Deal

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

"In recognition of last month's little upward blip, I suggest we allow ourselves a spontaneous victory fist bump."

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

"'Quid pro quo' is a no-no, Bradbury. Around here we say 'reciprocal altruism'."

'Our parents were replaced by machines - We'll be replaced with new software.'