In-law Jester Pillows

'Grant your mother asylum? Sure - I'll see if the sanitarium has any openings.'

"I know what this is, it's what mum and dad call 'working from home'...

"We're following Carrot Top."

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

'How about a game of cards?'

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

The New Fundamentals of Art: 'We'll begin with the most basic figure, the trademark attorney...'

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

"Because he's illiterate. That's why I have to read to him all the time."

"Not guilty but prepared to settle out of court, your honour."

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

"I feel like tearing of all your clothes and putting them in the washing machine."

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

"Yeah, I'm still scared of it too, but the worst part is that it seems to be GROWING...."

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

"#notguilty."

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

Stepping on clown's shoe...

Yawning barristers in court

"I say we move on to dessert."

A baby in court

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

"Your Honor, prior to sentencing, if it please the court, I'd like to make just a few brief remarks about pâte brisée."

'They named special prosecutors to investigate each other.'

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

"No, four glasses of water was enough. . . now I have to go to the bathroom!"