Imprisonment Narratives Lover Mugs

'Excuse me sir, What year is it'

"Dad, please tell me again about that mass production and consumerism."

". . . I called this meeting to communicate that I had dinner Noah..."

' It's a bit of an anti climax - I've washed it but I can't go any where ! '

Tic-tac-toe

"Jughead, Reggie, Betty, and Veronica—they've all been locked up. But you, Archie—I had higher hopes for you."

Prison Romance.

Wow. A corner office at last

'She's promised to wait for me but I only hope her memory isn't what it was!'

Man and bird

'Okay, the print media convicted you...but trust me, the video media will overturn the verdict.'

Anecdote Magazine

"No ham in this, I hope?"

'I guess it all started the day my mom said, son, if you put your mind to it, there's nothing you can't do.'

In The Bastille

''What I Did During My Summer Vacation -- A Coming of Age Story....''

Prison ain't so bad- ? -aside from all the metrosexual activity.

"Sorry, but your story contains way too much reality!"

"Try and give me... happy."

'It must have been quite a mid-life crisis if they gave you 30 years for it.'

"I was making big money! Yes, an inch too big."

Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Ohmygosh! What? What? Is a Kardashian here? Major scandal. Epic proportions. Infidelity of the highest order. Sadie Cohen has been cheating on Uncle Mort. Can you believe it? Sadie! The very image of perfection revealed as a fraud! She's not the image of perfection. Stick with me. This is for narrative purposes. Oh, fine. No way! But she's so perfect!

"Refusal to Obey a Police Officer. You?"

'I got busted for Identity Theft: I was pretending to be the Prince...'

"He says he won't wear a mask."

'Of course you can't remember what you had for breakfast -- we didn't HAVE any breakfast.'

'Tell you what - you've really caught the sun to-day.'

'It was the 'nothing but the truth' part that tripped me up.'

Noah's Ark Sculpture

"Neato, keeno - bunk beds!"

"It's an 'un'care package from my ex-wife." "Ooooh... is that K-Y Jelly?!"

Dear Edward, here is the cake in the file that you wanted. Love, Sue.

'You've got to get me out of here... my cellmate just gave me flowers and candy.'

"I think what I miss most is robbing people."

"For me, a confessions is much too autobiographical."