Impressionist Fan T-Shirts

Paul Cezanne

Farmyard impressions: 'I don't do the sounds, I do the smells.'

Vincent Van Gogh in the form of a Van.

'They all laughed when I told them that I was going to marry a magician.'

"And by president we mean the one on Saturday night tv, not the real one. He kinda sucks."

"Feel better, dear?"

When we met, you told me you make a lousy first impression. Well, guess what: You also make a lousy second impression. Actually, my only decent impression is Kirk Douglas. Wanna hear it?

'When did we permit the Jester to start doing impressions?'

"I have to say candidate two made a very good impression."

"I'd go with French Impressionist. It evokes the burnished golds of autumn leaves and the bittersweet regrets of lost love. It's also on special."

Vincent Van Goat.

Farmer's looking at paintings of haystacks.

'Kafka! Kandinsky! Kokoschka!'

"Here the artist opted for a more impressionistic approach, because drawing a tree is hard."

"So, how's your other half?"

"Lou, c'm'ere - you gotta check out this guy's Degas!"

Monet in the '90s.

Maurice Ravel.

'I don't understand. . . My escape trick has always worked!'

Artistic Grammar … Van Gogh. Van Going. Van Gone.

'So, Vincent, who is your target market?'

'Mr. Whipple, what other qualifications do you have - apart from your quite excellent Donald Duck impression?'

"You are the weakest wink...goodbye."

Museum of Art and Science. Monet. "Claude Monet, the father of impressionism, was a master of light. He sometimes painted in series, showing the passage of time with evolving sunlight and shadows." Einstein. "Albert Einstein won a Nobel Prize in Physics for his work in the dual nature of light, behaving like both a wave and a particle, and how this duality explains the photoelectric effect." I love that! Even though Einstein and Monet both worked with light, the only thing their work has

Unknown moments in art history. Manet? This is Monet --- I got some of your mail again.

"It's obviously an original."

Houdini's Dog

Edgar Degas

"The sad truth… Ow! My ear!"

"Do that thing where you walk like chuck berry."

'If you want to get anywhere with girls, you gotta PRETEND to like bunnies, ponies, and kittens.'

"He does impressions too!"

'He was an impressionist. Like that Alistair McGowan...'

Van Gogh.

Galerie de Commerce: Invoices of the Post-Impressionists