Impatient Shopper Gifts

'C'mon! Speed it up! I've got a bottle of wine here that says it's meant to be drunk soon!'

'She's so put together!'

Coming Soon! More Stuff You Could Live Without!

'Rozlyn, that blouse is very cute! I think you should get it.'

"I hate it when they put kittens in the impulse buying section."

Expensive greeting cards.

"Where's my order!? This service is terrible! That stuff will be cold by the time it gets here!! What's the hold-up!?!"

"I went by the pet store this morning, just for a peek."

'Just look'in'

'Are we nearly there yet Dad?'

"You might say I'm middle-of-the-road. I'd buy a fur coat but I wouldn't buy a Japanese fur coat."

"I wish you wouldn't buy things from people who come to the door."

'Okay, kids, we're finally here.'

"Never mind what's in the box. That'll be discussed at the end of the month."

'Then that's one steak well done and fries, and one anything as long as it's fast.'

"While you're waiting for your order, can I pick something off someone else's plate for you?"

"Hi honey, do we need anything for the junk drawer?"

"I got napkins, family photos, and the strongest lip balm in the city."

"You really shouldn't shop when you're hungry."

"I need nothing and I want everything."

"To prevent any complaints like "when will our ordered food be served" guests can now follow the work in the kitchen on TV."

'Make up your mind, M'sieur — a hundred years from now, what difference will it make what you had for lunch today?'

'He's sulking because I caught him licking the cake shop window.'

"I balance my manic compulsive buying with manic buyer's remorse."

"Slow down, I want to take a peek in Barneys!"

"Yes, two-for-one's a great deal, but we don't need any freshly cut Christmas trees in June!"

Ears Pierced While You Wait

'Dinner was taking too long, so I just went ahead and ordered pizza.'

Sofa Sale: 'I like this sofa - I'll take it.'

"You're such good company, impulsively purchased jumpsuit from last spring!"

Last-Minute Gifts

Shopping for an exercise bike

"How much is that Doge in the window?"