Impatient Gourmet T-Shirts

"While you're waiting for your order, can I pick something off someone else's plate for you?"

'I can't wait 'til hunting is googling and gathering is calling out for delivery.'

'What'll it be?'

'C'mon! Speed it up! I've got a bottle of wine here that says it's meant to be drunk soon!'

Writer and his Muse on a cookout.

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

"Where's my order!? This service is terrible! That stuff will be cold by the time it gets here!! What's the hold-up!?!"

"And what would you like to regret later?"

"You took your time!" "Better latte than never"

'That's funny... I could have sworn I saw the chef put him on the platter.'

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

"Monsieur Proust, we would like to discuss product placement for one of our cakes...."

"To prevent any complaints like "when will our ordered food be served" guests can now follow the work in the kitchen on TV."

"Fill it up!"

Salvador Deli

'Then that's one steak well done and fries, and one anything as long as it's fast.'

'You have an impressive cellar.'

'Make up your mind, M'sieur — a hundred years from now, what difference will it make what you had for lunch today?'

"It was a lovely holiday. The chips crispy and delicious, the ice cream cornets were to die for, the only downside being, the hostility of the humans, who were reluctant to share their sustenance."

artist painting portrait

The 60 Hour Gourmet Recipe For People Who Have Time To Spare And Then Some.

"Stomach content analysis shows the onions were sauteed after the pork was added but before adding the fennel."

'Dinner was taking too long, so I just went ahead and ordered pizza.'

'Don't give up hope - Anthony Bourdain is bound to show up sooner or later.'

'So what's it to be, Indian cuisine, Chinese take out or are you going to do the usual Russian Roulette?'

'Come on, make it snappy I haven't got all day,'

"No leads yet, but we're still hoping for a break in the case"

"Hurry up! I'm gasping for a cheese sandwhich."

That book is out of stock, but if you'd like to order a copy, I can have it here in 8-10 months. Staff

I've decided to take your advice and try something other than tea. What changed your mind? It occurred to me that if I try something you suggested, I may find that I detest it. I may hate it with every fiber of my being. It may even make me feel sick. AND THEN I'LL GET TO BLAME YOU! Always happy to help. (This cartoon was originally published on 2014-02-12).

Rodin's Thinker in front of refrigerator.

Enjoyment...reading...choosing...understanding.

'Sorry to keep you waiting.'

Frying sausages by the sea.

"Judge Edelman is taking the chicken livers under advisement, Gertrude; I've decided in favor of the veal; and Judge Hefferman seems to be recusing himself."