Impatient Gourmet T-Shirts

"While you're waiting for your order, can I pick something off someone else's plate for you?"

'What'll it be?'

'C'mon! Speed it up! I've got a bottle of wine here that says it's meant to be drunk soon!'

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

"Where's my order!? This service is terrible! That stuff will be cold by the time it gets here!! What's the hold-up!?!"

Writer and his Muse on a cookout.

"And what would you like to regret later?"

'That's funny... I could have sworn I saw the chef put him on the platter.'

"You took your time!" "Better latte than never"

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

"Monsieur Proust, we would like to discuss product placement for one of our cakes...."

'Then that's one steak well done and fries, and one anything as long as it's fast.'

Salvador Deli

"To prevent any complaints like "when will our ordered food be served" guests can now follow the work in the kitchen on TV."

"Fill it up!"

'You have an impressive cellar.'

'Make up your mind, M'sieur — a hundred years from now, what difference will it make what you had for lunch today?'

"It was a lovely holiday. The chips crispy and delicious, the ice cream cornets were to die for, the only downside being, the hostility of the humans, who were reluctant to share their sustenance."

artist painting portrait

The 60 Hour Gourmet Recipe For People Who Have Time To Spare And Then Some.

'So what's it to be, Indian cuisine, Chinese take out or are you going to do the usual Russian Roulette?'

"Stomach content analysis shows the onions were sauteed after the pork was added but before adding the fennel."

'Dinner was taking too long, so I just went ahead and ordered pizza.'

'Come on, make it snappy I haven't got all day,'

"No leads yet, but we're still hoping for a break in the case"

"Hurry up! I'm gasping for a cheese sandwhich."

Rodin's Thinker in front of refrigerator.

Enjoyment...reading...choosing...understanding.

Frying sausages by the sea.

"Judge Edelman is taking the chicken livers under advisement, Gertrude; I've decided in favor of the veal; and Judge Hefferman seems to be recusing himself."

'Sorry to keep you waiting.'

"Once the animal has been rendered lifeless, the rest is quite simple."