Impatient Feaster Pillows

"Fill it up!"

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

"Sarah has two mommies and both of them are good cooks."

"When it comes to turkeys, Mom, you sure know your stuff-ing."

The great bit pie chart of holiday season dining.

Stuffing the turkey.

'I couldn't find my measuring cups, so I had to kind of wing it with the stuffing.'

"Where's my order!? This service is terrible! That stuff will be cold by the time it gets here!! What's the hold-up!?!"

"You took your time!" "Better latte than never"

'I don't care what the timer says - my nose says they're done.'

'Pigs feet, sir? 'ARE THEY PICKLED?'

'This year, I thought I'd try a self-basting turkey!'

"I'm making Thanksgiving dinner this year. Do you have Turkey Helper?"

'Then that's one steak well done and fries, and one anything as long as it's fast.'

"While you're waiting for your order, can I pick something off someone else's plate for you?"

"To prevent any complaints like "when will our ordered food be served" guests can now follow the work in the kitchen on TV."

You are what you eat

T is for Turkey

Champagne speaking to lobster about going to the Derby

"The fire department ruined dinner."

'Make up your mind, M'sieur — a hundred years from now, what difference will it make what you had for lunch today?'

"We had this last year."

Too full after after Christmas dinner!

Wife leaving note 'midnight mass' on husbands distended stomache as she leaves house.

Christmas food.

'Dinner was taking too long, so I just went ahead and ordered pizza.'

"What're you doing for Thanksgiving, little buddy?" "Having a huge party." "It'll be full of turkey, cranberry sauce, wine, eggnog, football, and friends and family who love me dearly." "Oh, good. I was afraid you'd be alone all day playing video games." "'Turkey Slaughter VI' is no ordinary game." "You're coming to my place."

'Come on, make it snappy I haven't got all day,'

"I've gained ten pounds!" "Isn't that what the turkey weighed?"

"Nothing for him...he's stuffed."

'Keep carving, there are still a few identifiable parts.'

'It must of crept on over christmas...'

The Life Cycle of Cholent

'I hope everyone likes ostrich.'

"This is it! The perfect turkey!"