Idle Scroller Pillows

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

'It was a real scroller. I couldn't put down my screen.'

'I'm all for this interactivity.'

50% looking at phone, 50% looking for phone

'You're not interrupting anything...the four of us are just sitting around before dinner...Barbara, me and our two phones.'

'Leonardo's Lament' - 'I have nothing to do.'

'Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?'

"If I admit I'm bored with looking at my phone every minute of the day, will I be considered a traitor by my generation?"

Couch potato's shirt, "It suits you!"

"Can Ethan come out to swipe and scroll?"

"I was admitted to heaven, but they didn't have WIFI."

Using an electric toothbrush to stir tea

'Will this job requirer me to look up from my phone?'

'I occasionally need to read my tweets to remember what I was doing.'

'We're seeing more of this in the touch-pad era: your fingertips need a retread.'

'This is your last wish. Are you sure you want to use it to change channel again?'

Human evolution

The World Will Overheat and End Next Week: Like, will it be on You Tube?

Over-qualified?

"I’ve finally caught up on all the reels you’ve sent me."

"So...what have you been doing for your last week of summer break?"

'Well I'd love to stay and chat, but this is one of those 'get things done' days.'

Idlewild.

'That would be your perfect job...paid to do nothing!'

'Actually on a molecular level, I'm quite active.'

"Mindlessly scrolling through social media hasn't solved any of my problems."

Learn How To Ignore Positive Thoughts Keep Scrolling.

Virtual priority

"Your faucet is running."

"And this was us just five minutes ago."

"Everyone's life looks like a spring break montage, whereas mine feels like a sad court hearing."