Idiomatic Enthusiast Gifts

"You're the perfect storm. . . in a teacup."

"Oh dear, he died with his boots on."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"Thanks for walking a mile in my shoe but it's beginning to hurt now."

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

Washington D.C., Acronym Capital of the World

'Nurse, why is there always a fly in my ointment?'

"Nuts to you, too."

Sauce for the Goose

"Ahhh....I think that was a flying fuck."

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

"Sir, your ducks, they are not in a row."

Another day in the Splenda mines

"It's an honest mistake I'm sure we'll never hear of again."

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

Angel wears t-shirt with logo: YOLO.

'Justin, this isn't what I meant when I said we could make out like bandits.'

"Enough about the forest, why don't you show us more trees?"

'Why am I the one always getting kicked?'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

"No more thinking outside the box Bamford. From now on I want you to do all your thinking inside your box!"

Management Reshuffle

"Are you the one they call El Cóndor?"

Mort Park! You mean Killer. You're sprung, Killer. I'm free to go? Unless you're so tough now you'd rather stay. I mean a guy named Killer probably likes jail. Mail me my blanky.

"You scratch my back, I'll scratch your is just a figure of speech, Ned. A little left, and higher."

"Congratulations! You've won the bid."

"No, it hasn't, but when the sky does fall your investments are going to do very, very, well.''

"Good news. You know that elephant in the room we never talk about? He's now in the other room."

Museum of Natural Cliches

'Lance, what does 'NSFW' stand for?'

"Remember saying you'll give us a raise when 'pigs fly?' Well, it's time to pay up."

"And when someone gets your goat, what do you suppose it is that keeps you from going and getting it back?"

"My ship had finally come in. . . then it sank!"

'You failed your Latin exam! But Sweety, it's important to learn Latin: All your friends' names have Latin roots...'

"Sure. I know of a haystack on the edge of town where you'll be safe until the heat dies down."