Identity Theft Prevention Advocate Gifts

'I use the clones to help prevent identity theft.'

"On a positive note, he's not our boss. He's the guy who stole our boss's identity."

"Yours is the worst case of identity theft I've investigated."

"It's 'She's driving me crazy and I'm not sure whom to turn to.' "

"One of you got online and stole my identity, which is weird because there's not one thing unique about us."

'Well, I don't know anything about 'identity theft'. All I can tell you, is that according to these records you're already here.'

"Clean your browser history, mate?"

"All right, which one stole your identity?"

"Millions at risk from identity theft - good thing I'm safe."

At that moment Spartacus realized he was the victim of identity theft.

"I'll need to see some ID before you can settle this account..."

"Alexa, how do I stop knife crime?"

You know what? I think we are victims of identity theft!

"All ok. Wait, let's see what google remembers..."

'I've found that poverty helps protect my identity.'

'Don't act too adorable...we'll be half naked on the internet before we even know what privacy is!'

'I see you need help. When was your identity stolen, sir?'

"Pssst! Wanna buy back your browser history?"

"Actually, it's Paul E."

'It was identity theft by my body double!'

Now in Stock! 25 Million Names and Addresses on a 2 Disk Set.

'We'll try. In the meantime, I can offer you a great deal on a new identity to replace yours.'

'I put in this brick to slow down any potential purse snatchers.'

"I think you're perfect for this job. And not just because I'm afraid that if you don't get it you'll hack my phone and steal my identity."

Asking To Be Robbed

"It will stop people from stealing your wheel. I call it The Club."

Credit Cards Shredded.

'It was really hard for him when somebody stole his identity...but it felt even worse when they gave it back.'

"Whoa! This is my stolen identity!"

'I'm flattered... someone stole my identity.'

"That's the guy who stole my identity."

"Well, I suppose it could be identity theft. But that doesn't alter the fact that according to our records, you're already here."

'Someone stole my identity, but left my big hips.'

"Give me your name, address, and date of birth."

Warning! These premises protected by cheap window decals that probably don't fool anyone.