Identity Chameleon T-Shirts

'I don't think he's too happy with the identity we've given him, sarge!'

"Where would you see yourself in five years' time?"

'That's Oog -- he got a haircut and a job.'

"You dropped yer wallet."

'You must be the only 'Jack-of-all-trades' who is out of work in all of them!'

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

"Ambitions... to make a career change from tourism to sales."

Ed totally blows the final portion of his Chameleon Aptitude test.

'So when the bottom fell out of sheep shearing I had to find something else...'

"So, how long have you struggled with impostor syndrome?"

"A lot of you used to know us as the L.A. Punksters. Then for a while we were the Rappin' Rapmen. Now we call ourselves Los Latinos del Momento."

Farmer's Market.

"Charlie Greider... that rascal! I had a sneaking suspicion he'd be shedding his skin and moving on to a bigger company before too long!"

"I've got a great idea! By adding the words "and associates" to my business name, no one will every suspect I'm really just one person with a phone and a web site working out of my bedroom!"

"Can you go through all the old pitch decks and replace the word 'crypto' with 'AI'?"

'Reinvent yourself, and get back to us.'

'We don't have anyone here by that name. Was he perhaps using one of his aliases?'

'Mommy puts on a disguise every time, before she goes to work.'

'Of course I'll love you when you 'go grey'... Why shouldn't I... I've loved you through six other shades!'

"On your application it says you've been a circus clown, an orthopaedic surgeon and a molecular biologist."

I'm filling out my myface.com and I have a question. Rudy Park, tech genius, at your service. Should I pretend to be 10,12 or 26 years old? 32? I configure browsers, not fake personas! I think I'll play for the Broncos.

"I've been an accountant, an actuary, an advertising exec, an administrator, an architect, an art director, and an auditor, and now I'd like to move on to the B's."

"He retired as an executive, returned as a contractor, became a consultant and now he's a brooding presence."

"Your resume shows you have had numerous jobs and in all of them you were rather invisible."

'What do I do for a living?? Isn't it obvious?'

'This beauty will give you that British sound. It will convert your nasal twang into proper Queen's English.

'After 30 years around here, Jenkins has the ability to assume the tones and textures of his environment.'

Have you considered the possibility that you're only hiding from yourself?

Dion hires an image consultant: Ineresting. Now let's try Western and then Hip-Hop.

'Please hold any incoming personal calls for me. I need to disappear into character for a while!'

'You're a model - what sort, dear?'

'We may be bankrupt, but we're not broke.'

'Actually I started out in quantum mechanics, but somewhere along the way I took a wrong turn.'

The Ins and Outs of childhood

'On the internet, nobody knows you're a monkey.'