Ice Hotel Junkie Pillows

"I'm sorry but we don't have a room with a view."

Excess Baggage: You never have to worry about finding your way around those humongous new cruise ships. Your stomach will lead you.

"You call this ice?"

Trawling for Fish.

Cut out and keep your own Room Service.

"Here’s the thermostat. Like all hotel thermostats, it’s just for show."

"Happens at least once every ice fishing season."

"We used to be cooler."

'I really felt at home there. The food was awful!'

Giant Birthday Cake

'Room service? Please send up some fish oil.'

'Can I get a Chardonnay over dry ice? I hate it when my wine gets wet.'

Sparrow Hilton

Room service.

'I hear the Met office is predicting further Arctic weather conditions.'

"Mind if I take a bath first, pet."

"I'd like to leave a wake up call for, . ... OHH ..., April."

'I brought my mini bar with me.'

'Too bad... so much ice but not a single glass of lemonade!'

Hockey Goal

"Will my office be near an ice machine."

'We only have rooms with real teeth left!'

"Sorry - I'm out of ice."

Snowman and girl

'Personally this Global Warming thing is right up my alley.'

Hockey cheerleaders.

Medical Emergencies on Holiday.

'Am I shivering or giggling?'

'Uh oh, there's an icebreaker coming our way!'

happy bellboy carrying suitcases

"I'm so tired I can't think straight. Give me a room that's idiot-proof."

Chamber Pot - En Suite

'Ah, you must be the cleaner. I'm the dirtier.'