Ice Defense Architects Gifts

Protecting the goal.

'No ice.'

'Before we begin, everyone turn to the person next to you and give them a hug.'

Man standing in front of giant snowball

'I use these ice cubes to make minor home repairs.'

"Stay-at-home Snowdad."

Ice-Cube-IV

"The key is to keep the momentum going when you're establishing the base of the snowman..."

Baker

"Just a drop."

"Well, ONE of us is at the wrong pole..!"

'We should have bought the piano first, and built the igloo around it.'

Igloo Windfarm.

Tall Snowman

Child making ice sculpture.

"Stick to it. There's a future in cryogenics."

'Can Kevin come out and play?'

We divided it up and turned it into a rental.

Cutting round an igloo...

Ice Sculpting Class.

"Mmm... not sure about these new high-rises..."

Sir, they must have known we were going to storm the castle --- It was already weather-proofed!

"I thought it might speed up the dating process."

'We should have bought the piano first, and built the igloo around it.'

"It's a bit derivative."

'Like the nose job? Look for the kid with vegetable peeler!'

'It'll have to come down - you failed to apply for proper planning permission...'

"Hi, I'm your new neighbour. I work as a maintenance engineer on the Thames Flood Barrier."

Nothing but snow and ice for 1500 miles -- how does he DO it?

'I need to do better real estate investments. First, the housing crisis made me lose 75% of my house's value...and now, global warming is melting it!'

"The snow came from the clouds, but it was assembled in America."

'Low Temperature Physics Lab'

Igloo outhouse.

Rude Devil Snow Angel

We'll see who's laughing when this is all water.