Ice Artist Gifts

Child making ice sculpture.

"Do you honestly believe we evolved from a single snow flake?"

'It's my homage to Picasso.' (Snowman is all mixed up with eyes and nose in odd places)

Lemniskate

'I do a lot of icing. It's part of my mellowness.'

"No, Doris, not implants!"

"He wants to be a plastic surgeon when he grows up."

Cake

I LOVE YOU IN ICING

"Hell, Mom! How's it look?!" "Holy mackerel."

'Don't you like it, Dad?'

Baking

'I use these ice cubes to make minor home repairs.'

'The guy who made me is a fan of Magritte.'

'Oh yeah? Well, to hell with tradition. We're building a snow woman!'

"You call this ice?"

Ice-Cube-IV

"It's a snowman, dear. Assembly required."

Making snowmen with a snowblower.

"Edward! Where are our children?"

"Date of birth?" "1989." "In 1989 I couldn't make ice... still can't." "Good lord, she could be my daughter! I'm so #!@* old." "That's the year my wife left me. Now I have a cold and I'm depressed!"

"We used to be cooler."

"I'm a guy. The darn kids just thought this was funny."

Igloo Windfarm.

"By the time I was supposed to resume my hockey career, I had discovered ice dancing."

"Be there in a minute. I'm just putting the icing on your cake."

"Maybe we should wait until you're a little taller before you put the face on again, huh?"

Cake Writer's Block

"I'd like a vanilla cupcake with buttercream icing on the side."

"Your aunt wants to know what we're doing these days, so I'm sending her a picture of our fridge."

Violin Playing Snowman.

Snowman Tips Hat... And Head.

"Sorry - I'm out of ice."

Ice Sculpting Class.

"I wonder why the kids named me Mourinho? I hope it's not because I'll only last a few days..."