Hydration Humorist Pillows

Cross-country runners picking up water and spare batteries.

Alligator drinking Gatorade,

"Oh boy, I'm seriously dehydrated, I'm stuck: Get me a drink quick please..."

"For crying out loud! It’s empty!!"

It's called "thirst," but I'm not sure I can explain it to you.

"I really shouldn't. It goes straight to my bladder."

A Matter of Course.

The German Answer to a Hydrating Sports Drink : Non-Alcoholic Beer!

'Is that the water authority? Can I use my hosepipe to pump out the basement?'

Knight with a tap in his armour.

Hydration

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

Lactose Intolerant

"I'm afraid you could go at any time."

PSA Banter.

'I don't believe it. Five minutes after he gets the darn thing, he has an arrest!'

'Call me immediately if there's any serious side effects so I can notify my lawyer.'

'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'

Providing Healthcare For All

'You know you're getting old when you take longer to recover than to get tired.'

In case of Emergency: Break Glass

"Happy birthday, dear. You still have that sparkle in your eyes!" "That sparkle burned out years ago. These are cataracts."

'What you seem to be suffering from is longevity.'

'Will I live Doctor?' 'Yes, but I don't advise it!'

'We're all out of flu vaccine - how about something for anxiety...?'

'His workout regimen consists of 50 sit-downs every day.'

"Is that your idea of a well balanced diet"

Would you be willing to sign something regarding the fat content of your burger? Like what? My colon.

Doctor to man with 'Push' door on mouth: 'It looks as though you've been eating a lot of junk food lately.'

"Reverend, I recommend you turn the other cheek."

Dog wearing a cone

Treat Dispensers for the Middle-Aged

"Gesundheit!"

'It may be more inconvenient, but the 'Reverse Prostate Exam' is a lot less embarrassing for the both of us.'

My Dream Valentine