Humorist With Green Fingers T-Shirts

Clown watering his flowers.

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

'It's an extinction notice.'

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

The Gardener's Holiday: Don't leave produce behind you to perish.

'I don't give advice. I'm only up here because it's safer.'

"I didn't see the coffee table in the middle of the room, due to my visual impairment, caused by the rubbish light emitted by the government approved 150 watt energy saving bulb in my apartment..."

Recycling bottle bank.

'...and this is the water garden...'

"I wouldn't take the name 'dog strangling vine' literally."

You will always find a spot to garden

Oil Spill Hits Wall St.

This is where Brent council sends you

"Must've planted those seeds upside down..."

"This is a terrible table!"

'You haven't much experience in plant conservation, have you Winthorpe?'

"You have a good lie."

"Rising sea levels."

"You're not helping the methane problem, you know."

'There! another batch of clean coal.'

"Will this global warming mean we'll have longer summer vacations?"

You Are Here.

Perfect solution. Free street lighting, and we sell the surplus to the national grid.

An snail shell with a chimney

'The only problem with solar powered air conditioners is finding a long enough extension cord.'

'It's a shame that valuable water gets wasted to wash cars or to take showers. It should be used responsible and for useful purposes only - for example to make whiskey.'

"Your DNA test came back – you're 49% from the Amazon, 49% from the Caribbean, and 2% from some plastics plant in Texas."

'Was this eye of newt locally sourced?'

"Let's not migrate, and just say we did.;"

'What we have to do is utilize some pollution control equipment in our manufacturing of pollution control equipment.'