Humorist With Green Fingers T-Shirts

Clown watering his flowers.

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

'It's an extinction notice.'

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

The Gardener's Holiday: Don't leave produce behind you to perish.

Recycling bottle bank.

'I don't give advice. I'm only up here because it's safer.'

"I didn't see the coffee table in the middle of the room, due to my visual impairment, caused by the rubbish light emitted by the government approved 150 watt energy saving bulb in my apartment..."

'...and this is the water garden...'

You will always find a spot to garden

"I wouldn't take the name 'dog strangling vine' literally."

This is where Brent council sends you

Oil Spill Hits Wall St.

"Must've planted those seeds upside down..."

"This is a terrible table!"

'It's self cleaning, and runs on natural gas.'

"You're not helping the methane problem, you know."

Shipwrecked with an environmentalist.

'You haven't much experience in plant conservation, have you Winthorpe?'

"Rising sea levels."

"You have a good lie."

'There! another batch of clean coal.'

"Will this global warming mean we'll have longer summer vacations?"

Perfect solution. Free street lighting, and we sell the surplus to the national grid.

You Are Here.

Just think! If the mall goes bust, what happens to all that paved-over land? Save our mall. We could roll up the asphalt and start a huge nature preserve. What about current wildlife? Hmm�You're right. I don't think the endangered species act covers mall rats.

Hairy Potter.

Cactus Huggers

'The only problem with solar powered air conditioners is finding a long enough extension cord.'

'What we have to do is utilize some pollution control equipment in our manufacturing of pollution control equipment.'

"I'm doing my part to conserve electricity."

"Your DNA test came back – you're 49% from the Amazon, 49% from the Caribbean, and 2% from some plastics plant in Texas."

We've gotten all we can with traditional drilling techniques. What do you know about fracking?

"Let's not migrate, and just say we did.;"