Humor In Formality Pillows

"Am I the party of the first part or the party of the second part?"

Madonna of the Pukes.

"Yes, it's oil-paint: It's difficult to find water for watercolours around here..."

Bride is angry, as she notices that the groom figure on the cake is drunk.

Sea Horse outside saloon

'Instead of 'Sincerely Yours...' say 'This message was approved by Harlow Rains.''

"Ah, you'll be wanting our red tape department, third door on the left!"

"Sinead?!"

Bureaucratic castle

"In this corporation, Mr. Taylor, at this level we do not do shirtsleeves."

"Miss Penny to inquire about the tardiness of evening kibble."

"Tee hee. . . Turner Prize here I come. . .!"

Could I trade in this greyhound for a dachshund? My doctor says I have to slow up.

'There are limits to this seriousness, sir!'

'I.R.S short form.'

'What I wouldn't give for some good eczema medication!'

'I hate these things. They're always so formal.'

'Is that your wife's anniversary present?' - 'Yes, it's an annual report on our marriage.'

Sign on desk reads: 'Business spoken here.'

"The fax machine ate my homework."

"Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your money."

'This is your last warning. Move again and I quit!'

"I noticed you've packed the gallery with your relatives."

A boy saying he will wait for the women to leave the room before he eats

'I don't like the way your eyes light up when that nurse comes in!'

'Have I heard his last joke? I do hope so!'

'Date of birth?' - 'Tenth of February 1979' - 'Sex?' - 'Yes, please.' - '£1,000 fine?' - '...totally worth it.'

'I know I said 'at ease'...but not to that extent.'

"These are your friends the Erskines, sir. Madam kisses both of them. You kiss her and you shake his hand. Then you wink and say, 'Hey, how about those Yankees?' "

"Let me put it this way - I wouldn't buy any bananas that are too green."

Hippie giving presentation

'Mr. Conway came here without an appointment, didn't you, Mr. Conway?'