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'This is the place I was telling you about.'

Medusa gets a trim.

Yes, Princess had a little accident

"Sorry...I overslept."

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

Playing Fetch.

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

Larry's used art

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

Police Feline Unit

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

Grace For Flies

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

"His first out-of-body experience."

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

...And he calls himself the 'Green' Giant...

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'Remember only you can prevent forest fires.'

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"Why do they do that?"

"So, tell me a little bit more about this house training you mention on your CV."