Hr Interviewer Pillows

I believe you're desperate for delivery staff.

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

'How fast can you hype?'

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

"Another job well done by your conflict resolution specialist."

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

"'Quid pro quo' is a no-no, Bradbury. Around here we say 'reciprocal altruism'."

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

"So, tell me a little bit more about this house training you mention on your CV."

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

How leaders fail

Outer Space Outsourcing

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"

"If this goes badly I'm going to post it on my youtube job interview bloopers channel."

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

'Had I known Hell was going to be exactly like work, I probably wouldn''t have spent as much time there.'

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

"No training period, but you can purchase my instructional video on line for $49.95."

'Salaries Manager. No.'

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

"You're just the man we're looking for. Come around to this side of the desk, and I'll gather up my things and get the heck out of here."

"And where have you previously moused?"

"These are the principal qualities we're looking for in our new recruits."

"Where would you see yourself in five years' time?"

'What's wrong now?'

'You'll have to take an online company aptitude test, but if you're the designer we're looking for, you've already designed an app for that.'

I'm a self-made man!

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

"There are no big jobs, only small machines."