Hovering Guardian T-Shirts

'Oh no! My children are out of my sight!'

"He likes it."

'You must be Jimmy's father . . .'

"Why do small children ask so many questions?" "Why not? We need to learn, don’t we? Anyway it’s no big deal is it? Isn’t that what parents are for? You were probably the same, weren’t you? So why complain?"

"Boy, the kids are growing up so fast!"

"Huddleston, I admire your hands-on approach to everything, but get the hell out of my office!"

'At midnight, we go over the wall.'

'I'm getting some unusually high readings around you.'

"People were steal his ideas"

The proper way to wear your mask

"We like to think he's experimenting with color and form, but his art therapist suggested we're not giving him enough candy."

Bleak House

"We've given it a great deal of thought and we decided we're going to give in to everything you want at all times."

Beekeeping 101

'Ok...something, but nothing you'd care about. Honest!'

'Polly wants a machine gun.'

'Which end's the shallow end?'

"It's a very effective scarecrow."

"If the stock market goes to infinity, would we be able to pay off the national debt?"

"Apologies, sir. The mansion is haunted by Randy, the master's late spaniel."

"He's allergic to peanuts, sensitive to wheat, lactose-intolerant, and just plain weirded out by fruit."

'Nap time's over, Ms. Doan. You have to wake them up.'

'Isn't it great Darling: The kids are now old enough to have dinner ready when we get home...'

"Are you sure this is in your job description?"

'What do you mean give the boy a house key? He'll lose it, learn how to break in despite our sophisticated security system and be on his way to a life of crime.'

'You couldn't just lock him up somewhere, could you?'

"They'd better not have done anything to my whales."

'Sheep-dogs give me the creeps: I can't tell if they're watching me or not...'

Brother Kevin is wrecking the dorm!

"Well, I can't read, but I assume it's a sign the humans have put there to show it's a rubbish dump..."

Never divulge your credit card pin number to your children!'

Safety: 'When Can I Work On My Own?'