Housing Market Wrangler Pillows

'Good point. It's been on the market far too long. I'll change the picture. I shouldn't be smiling.'

Building Site - Life Jackets must be worn.

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

"Try not to think of it as a box, but rather as an environmentally neutral, biodegradable, single person unit of accommodation!"

Real Estate Personals

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

TV show is called Repossesion Repossession. Man says: 'I see the property shows are reacting to the economic downturn.'

An exaggeration of estate agents

"When we said we'd build 'affordable' homes we had a particular buyer in mind."

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

'Now, it does require some modernisation. . . .'

'The Dow has shot up 2.5% on positive data on housing - until five minutes from now, when it'll be interpreted differently.'

'It's all about location, location, location!'

'What makes you think the basement leaks?'

Home Foreclosed Home.

"Local authorities are always whining on about the cost of 'affordable' housing..."

"And then the three bears were slowly forced out of the neighborhood due to major corporations cornering the market—The once cozy cottage is now an Air B&B." "The end."

Those who fail to learn from the past will be forced to relive it.

'Oh no! We're in negative equity.'

Turtle Home

"This place has a water view if you're looking at the mortgage."

House hunting is cruel.

"To be honest, I'd be stupid not to take advantage of the market."

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us and, even if it was, I doubt either of us could afford to buy a place here given the current sellers' market."

Dog Realtor

'Looks like you're underwater on your mortgage.'

'Forget my mortgage application, fill this bag with money. I've decided to make a cash offer!'

'It looked a lot bigger in the photos.'

'It seems good, and he said the bit at the bottom is the name of the architect.'

"The landlord has promised to sort out the damp problems."