Housing Jugglers Gifts

Homeless elderly parents - 'Isn't it nice that our kids are finally on the property ladder?'

"Well the good news is that after the reorganisation you'll be leading the team."

"Actually, I'm really looking for blessings that aren't in disguise"

Acclaimed mother.

There now, that wasn't too difficult was it!

"And I'm sure no one will mind if we fold a few clothes while we talk."

'You've spelt 'C.V.' wrongly.'

"Your former employer said you demonstrated a remarkable amount of 'get up and go'...especially when you were fired."

The stock market sky is falling.

Money mangagement see-saw.

'He pats my back, but I don't pat his.'

"I didn't feel any 'earthquake'."

Collapse of 'Corner Men'

"Under 'salary desired', could you be more specific than 'obscene'?"

'Your r

'I have to warn you that hills may go up as well as down.'

'Tell me about yourself. If I stay awake, you've got the job.'

'I won't lie, it can get windy here.'

'Applicant wacked out, suggest immediate promotion.'

A Temporary One Day A Year Job Is Not Enough, I Want A Permanent Job!

"It's not begging if you've been to college. It's attempting to arrange interim financing while restructuring your debt load."

"Well if you don't agree with my count, then you do it."

'Times have changed. Now you need a degree just to end up living in your parents' basement.'

"Your resume is excellent, except for your name, which is stupid."

Where do you see yourself in ten years?

"These investments aren't without risk. Your mailbox might explode with prospectuses."

"Only another thousand points up and I'm even, honey."

"Are you sure our off shore holdings are safe?"

"How much are they for my rent? About three times a week!"

'Until that stabilizes, we will be monitoring your doses of market news.'

'Since team building activities have taken most of our meeting, we have 30 seconds to discuss profits.'

"My last job was as a mine interpreter...I would go to a park and describe what the mime was trying to convey."

"I'd like to avoid a costly and embarrassing trial but I could use the media exposure."

'The house has been repossessed by the Devil ...'

'Your portfolio took a beating...,but the good news is no humans or animals were injured.'