Household Chore Warriors Pillows

"What is that creepy sound?" "Don't worry. It's just the ghost of the old dishwasher."

Kitchen Tetris

Washing Line Walker

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

"Being a parent is like being in prison. . . except we don't get the hour of exercise."

"Congratulations, Figbert. I'm making you Vice President in charge of my wife's Honey-Do-List."

'Don't think of sweeping as a chore. Consider it practice for the Olympic Curling Team.'

"Just empty it."

'I did my part of house cleaning, now it's your time...it's shovel ready'

"You hate ironing? Me too."

'Mr. big shot scientist who works 18 hours a day at a prestigious lab developing high strength corrosion inhibitors, but can I get him to spend 2 minutes getting rust stains out of our own tub? No.'

"That goes to the dry cleaners."

'Who's the clown responsible for ordering the new exercise equipment?'

'As the CEO of a large corporation, I don't suppose you'd consider taking out the garbage?'

Nate Sure Abhors a Vacuum!

"I knew it would be a silly idea to ask him to hang the washing out for me,"

'Mom, how old was I when Dad first hired you to do all this stuff around the house?'

"You call that a made bed?"

'When he said he wanted to put me on a pedestal, it was only so I could dust the ceiling fan!'

'Well, dear, I did tell you to stay out of my way when I'm vacuuming!'

Professional Dishwasher Loading Championship

"It's your own fault! Remember when I told you to wash that shirt in cold water?"

'I'll see your 'Washing the Dishes' and raise you 'Two Loads of Laundry''

Tunnel of Laundry.

'Yes it's a conspiracy theory, he's never ever done the washing up.'

"I would be happy to help you with the dishes, Mom, but I'm afraid I'd get water in my phone."

'What's your washing dishes got to do with human rights?'

'Washing dishes, why?'

"Are you using the right size nail for mother's picture?"