Household Chore Warriors Pillows

"What is that creepy sound?" "Don't worry. It's just the ghost of the old dishwasher."

Kitchen Tetris

Washing Line Walker

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

"Congratulations, Figbert. I'm making you Vice President in charge of my wife's Honey-Do-List."

"Being a parent is like being in prison. . . except we don't get the hour of exercise."

"Can you train him to bite my husband whenever the trash gets full?"

'Don't think of sweeping as a chore. Consider it practice for the Olympic Curling Team.'

"Just empty it."

"You hate ironing? Me too."

"That goes to the dry cleaners."

'Mr. big shot scientist who works 18 hours a day at a prestigious lab developing high strength corrosion inhibitors, but can I get him to spend 2 minutes getting rust stains out of our own tub? No.'

Why do you always get to ash and I always have to dry?

'I did my part of house cleaning, now it's your time...it's shovel ready'

"You used the right amount of detergent and fabric softener. The problem is this washing machine isn't for dishes."

'Who's the clown responsible for ordering the new exercise equipment?'

"I knew it would be a silly idea to ask him to hang the washing out for me,"

You mean none of you took out the trash? Why you rarely see a female polygamist.

'As the CEO of a large corporation, I don't suppose you'd consider taking out the garbage?'

Nate Sure Abhors a Vacuum!

"You call that a made bed?"

'Mom, how old was I when Dad first hired you to do all this stuff around the house?'

'When he said he wanted to put me on a pedestal, it was only so I could dust the ceiling fan!'

No caption. (A woman folding laundry from the dryer is looking at a mouse folding laundry from a mousehole on the side of the dryer).

I told you to lift your @#$% feet.

'Well, dear, I did tell you to stay out of my way when I'm vacuuming!'

"It's your own fault! Remember when I told you to wash that shirt in cold water?"

'I'll see your 'Washing the Dishes' and raise you 'Two Loads of Laundry''

Professional Dishwasher Loading Championship

'Yes it's a conspiracy theory, he's never ever done the washing up.'

I thought I told you to straighten your room. (Originally published on 2008-01-08).

"I would be happy to help you with the dishes, Mom, but I'm afraid I'd get water in my phone."

Tunnel of Laundry.

'What's your washing dishes got to do with human rights?'

'Washing dishes, why?'