House Buying Pillows

Man with head in ground: 'I'm not burying my head in the sand, I'm doing the coal mining search myself.'

'The acting was awful and the plot was thin, but the mortgage rate looked interesting.'

"It's perfect."

"He's considered a fixture, so he's included with the house."

'We're having a sale of 'for sale' signs.'

'You're on the very bottom of the 'property ladder'. Or as we estate agents call it; 'the food chain'.'

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"I can't believe how great my life is now: We used to live in an apartment, but now, I have my own garden..."

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

'Progress of a bookshelf'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

"First time pruning?"

'These elves sure are helpful around the house.'

Homegrown solutions for a smaller carbon footprint.

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

"Yes, I know they fit, it's just not what I pictured for a three car garage!"

'What's wrong with our new shed? Nothing - I'm sat out here guarding it.'

"I may not know much about art, but I do know what's suitable for framing."

"No, our home wasn't stolen. Since it's a 'smart home', it keeps having itself moved to a nice neighborhood."

I did it my way.

Sale! Weed Whackers

'Is there any chance at all I could get you to stop leaving your pantyhouse laying around?!'

Name one serious woodworker who doesn't use state of the art kit. Thomas Chippendale.

The Tightrope Balancing Act of Home Ownership and Interest Rates.

"We went for Scandinavian interiors."