House Buyer Pillows

"It's a bit isolated - the nearest shop's two galaxies away."

Monopoly game - "You just gazumped me!"

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

'Progress of a bookshelf'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

'Betty liked the way her house provided lots of private space.'

'For an explanation of the financial terms of this loan, please enroll in a continuing-education economics class at your local community college.'

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

First National Bank. Keep life exciting --- Ask about our variable rate, interest-only mortgages.

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

Practical loans vs. devil-may-care loans.

"I'm bored - let's buy a house in the country that has lots of problems."

'And this is Eddy, he's been giving virtual tours long before computers.'

' ... and this is the half bath.'

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

"Talk about energy efficient...every lightbulb in this house will outlive you!"

"Since you had so much fun with the Home Equity Loan I gave you, this year's stocking will be filled with a shiny new Notice of Foreclosure."

Reverse Mortgage.

"Of course you're feeling tired - you're in your sub-prime."

Do you like to talk about Real Estate? Like to meet other men and women who do? Dial the... REAL-ESTATE HOTLINE

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

Bank Loans - Thank you, I shall always be in your debt.

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

'...And as suburban sprawl continues to grow, many people are finding themselves living uncomfortably close to their wildlife neighbors.'

"This condo includes free access to fitness facilities...7 flights of stairs."

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

"It's been unanimously decided that we don't like this table. Could you show us another model?"

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

"A little baking soda will get rid of the smell.

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

"I know it looks fine, but let's get an engineer's report and a termite inspection just to be on the safe side."

I'm buying a house. You're broke. So? the interest rate plans are amazing. The banks are giving money away. Besides, the housing market is going nuts. If I buy today, I can sell next year for a huge profit. I suddenly feel faint. You look ill, Mr. Powell.