Property Buying Pillows

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

"Folks, we're in a hot market ...so you might want to make an offer before the fire trucks get here."

'You won't find a nicer view for the price they're asking!'

Sold at almost the price we bought it for

'I'm sorry, but we haven't seen a price range that low since Roosevelt was in office.'

Very steep climb: 'I thought this house sounded cheap.'

'Estate Agent.'

"Did I mention it was close to transport?"

"If a sixth borough opens up, I'll let you know."

"Okay, so the current occupants are being tormented by supernatural forces, but they do agree to pay closing costs."

"The meaning of life is location, location, location."

"And this listing was recently upgraded with an ocean side view."

Estate Agents - Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter Here.

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

Estate Agents - Visitors Welcome.

"I've just been gazumped!"

"It's got everything: northern exposure, hardwood floors, central tree."

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

Selling lemon latt�

"Our detractors call it suburban sprawl, but I prefer thinking of our plan as 'sustainable over-development!'"

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"You called me, boss?" "Yes, I overheard you talking to patrons about all the new planets we’ve found." "I want you to stop doing that." "At least until I’m done buying up as much of that real estate as I can. I don’t need any competitors driving up the prices." "Very bad man." "When the hipsters run out of cities to gentrify here, my properties on Gliese 581c are going to make a killing."

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

'And this is Eddy, he's been giving virtual tours long before computers.'

Somewhere in France: "I thought I was buying goat cheese. I endedup with a chateau in the Loire."

Do you like to talk about Real Estate? Like to meet other men and women who do? Dial the... REAL-ESTATE HOTLINE

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

"Great for worship then! Great for retail now!"

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

"This condo includes free access to fitness facilities...7 flights of stairs."

"A little baking soda will get rid of the smell.

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

I'm buying a house. You're broke. So? the interest rate plans are amazing. The banks are giving money away. Besides, the housing market is going nuts. If I buy today, I can sell next year for a huge profit. I suddenly feel faint. You look ill, Mr. Powell.