Hotels Pillows

"Does anyone else's robe say 'Hyatt'?"

'look at this hotel. They leave a ball of yarn on your pillow!'

The Vineyardia

"You were right-they've got one at the hotel."

"Room service, Sir, You wanted someone to listen to your speech..."

Birds talking about package holiday makers - "Amazing how they find there way back every year."

"Where do I swipe?"

'I know we asked for a room with running water,but...'

'Couldn't you have taken the robe instead?'

"If I promise to come back serval times, can I get the group rate?"

'Room service? Please send up a towel. In a minute sir, someone's using it.'

"If you are a Democrat, Mrs. Hooper-Smith does the Macarena during your pancakes."

"I'd like to leave a wake up call for, . ... OHH ..., April."

"You've got your favorite room - right by the ice machine."

"Do you have a room for a couple of knights?"

Live Elevator Music 3-7:30.

"Did we ask for a heart-shaped tub?"

"Would you like a 'scratching' or 'non-scratching' room?"

"Front desk? There are no little candies on my pillow."

'Camping is nature's way of promoting B&Bs.'

'What gave him this idea?'

'What do you mean there's no room for the 'no vacancy' sign?'

'Reservations.'

'I don't know if we should stay there, dear. That kennel only got two stars.'

Octopus porter.

" ....you didn't say wanted one that worked."

Compliments of the House.

"This hotel is web-friendly - there's one in every room..."

'Ah, you must be the cleaner. I'm the dirtier.'

"Business bad I see"

'This is not an automatic elevator, sir.'

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

'When you lie here you can see why it's called a Four Star Hotel. That's how many stars you can see through the hole in the roof!'

"You're home, dear. We don't have room service."

"Oh, now you want to talk, when all week it was 'Do Not Disturb.'"