Hot Dog Hero Pillows

"What about the five that fell through?"

"Are the hot dogs the burned ones or the really burned ones?"

'I was just going to go for your hot dogs, but you put them all the way up in that tree, so...Sorry.'

Diner to cook: 'Now, I'm not complaining, but why is there a flea collar on my chili dog?'

What's not to like? They're cheap, tasty adn don't destroy the Rain Forest.

Hot dog vendor with military-style equipment.

Hot Dog

'That was fun!'

'Oh, and I suppose I'm the only one who's ever heard it's a 'dog eat dog world'?'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

"Everything on our menu uses organic, locally sourced, graveyard-to-table ingredients."

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

Best Before 5th Pint.

"Any of you guys feel like hot dogs?"

How The Sausage Is Eaten

"As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from restless dreams, transformed into a monstrous vermin, he thought to himself: never again bourbon and tequila in the same night, and this time, I mean it."

"He took eight shots on the 19th hole!"

"How was my day? I'm still calculating the little victories minus the humiliations I normally suffer."

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

"By 'dress down day', most of us mean not wearing a jacket!"

Back in 5 minutes!

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

'The way I see it, drinking is its own reward.'

'They're not beer stains. This is actually a 'Rorschach test' patterned shirt.'

Oh no ... Outsourcing

"Hey! Hey! I could gopher another lemon drop over here, please and thank you."

'Mustard, ketchup and mayo are all nice and creamy smooth. Why isn't anything being done about relish?'

"I'm off, I only popped in for a swift three units."

"Make me one with everything!"

Businessman at a bar mad to look like desk. Bartender says: 'The usual, Mr. B?'

"The chef made some substitutions to tonight's menu. Instead of Escarots a la Bourguignonne, he's cooking hot dogs."

"It feels like me against the world but it's actually just the state of Connecticut."

"It's a full moon somewhere."

"Where do you see yourself getting drunk in five years?"

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."