Hospital Chaos Appreciator Pillows

"Nine out of ten doctors are in the wrong room."

'Let go of that balloon right now!'

'You'll be able to lead a normal life after the operation -- except, of course, for your enormous medical bills.'

"I expect a speedy recovery,"

'Your doing GREAT! Tomorrow you should be able to eat hospital food!'

Look on the bright side...they'll probably name a disease after you.

'Well for crying out loud, why didn't you do that when I asked you?!!'

Hospital porter leaving brain behind

"Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream. Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily..."

Man is attacked by sea creature.

'Sometimes patients become a little attached.'

'Two scalpels and a nurses hat are missing...'

'And that's the simplest way to surgically remove a 'mole' from the patient!'

'We've been told to get families more involved in patient care, he'll need a bath and lunch in about 30 minutes.'

"Sorry for the wait - I hope it wasn't too long."

Thank You to Vaccinators

Hospital Visit

Coronavirus

'Dude, I got the rest of the day off, so I'll be able to go riding after all!'

'Who gets the penile implant, him or me?'

'Wake him up. We need informed consent for the next part.'

'You were clinically dead for over a week. Gave us all quite a little scare.'

Miracles on 34th Street.

Studying Fire Behavior

ER, The Musical: 'I'm a medic...' 'n' I'm a medic...' 'They're a paramedics!'

'Have you got to have a Gimmick.'

"It's not for soaking your feet. . . it's a bed pan."

"Sorry about this. Some kids from the neighborhood flushed a cherry bomb down our sub-atomic particle accelerator."

'Why can't you order ravioli or pizza?'

'Hey doctor, how come I'm totally alone in this section?'

"This sub tastes much better with some traffic jam."