Horse Dealers T-Shirts

Horse dealer trying to sell an unfit horse by suggesting that it will keep improving

Drool Marks

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

"Do you buy cars here?"

'It seats two comfortably.'

'It's St Patrick's Day...I thought you called this car your lucky charm??!'

'If you're looking for compensatory materialism on wheels, look no further.'

First past the post.

'I'm afraid you'll have to buy a car, sir -- Braxton, here, accidentally sold your car to somebody else.'

"It goes from the factory to us in $29,500."

'Take me to your auto body shop.'

General Motors.

'I can't stand to see an animal in pain....'

Big yellow sports utility vehicle.

Man with desk organizers labelled 'Wheeling' and 'Dealing'.

Barry gradually realised that buying a small car had its disadvantages

New-Car Shopping with Arianna Huffington: 'She says if we give her a car, she'll give us exposure by driving it around.'

'Hey, that's a bad roll. Let's try that again.'

'...and what do doctors recommend for pain?'

'NEW! Runs on alcohol' 'What a coincidence - so does he.'

I told you not to use horse liniment as an underarm deoderant...

"If you want to buy this, I'm afraid I'm going to need to see some justification."

"This baby can take you from zero to cardiac arrest in 60 seconds!"

The car showroom

Remounts for the Yeomanry

'The car dealership is letting me buy an expensive sports car, one piece at a time. I decided to buy the steering wheel first.'

"It's perfect for commuting to college. Definitely a learning experience."

'Its only owner was a little old lady, who will still insist on driving it to church on Sundays.'

'What he lacks in speed he gains in nose.'

'What?... You wanted your horse SHOD!?'

"Don't let this one take any cars out for a test-drive!"

'I see you've found a cure of the 'new car fever'.'

'Of course I will! Hey, I can't go wrong - my brother is a divorce lawyer and my dad is a gun dealer!'

'Mom! Hunter keeps saying I'm not a thoroughbred. Can you show him my papers?'

"So the question you need to ask yourself is - 'Just how much of a mid-life crisis can I afford?'"