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"Any side effects aside from ringing in the ears?"

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

Meet Stephen Krkzk Author of 'Why Conspiracy Theories Are Nonsense'

Love at First Sight

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

Transylvanian backpackers.

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

"You do realize I'm going to have to bill you for ten?"

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

'... And this is my cellar.'

'He's not as studious as he looks - his backpack is full of comic books.'

Night of the Latkes

"Why am I always the designated driver?!"

Dead Funny

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

Silence of the Chickens...

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

Night of the Zombonies.

"What are you looking at, four eyes?"

Unfinished painting of a monster in a lake sits beside the lake with no painter in sight

Chiller Theatre

'Well,he certainly has his father's nose!'

"I don't know what else we can do. He won't look up from the screen!"

'Well, now we know why Dracula's been getting all the girls lately.'

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

"It's such a beautiful day. Why don't we go out and get someone to eat?"

"I'm the bad guy..."

He looks so natural lying there...