Homebuyer With A Twist Gifts

Strip Mine Estates - Mineral Rights? They're All Yours.

'And this is Eddy, he's been giving virtual tours long before computers.'

"Talk about energy efficient...every lightbulb in this house will outlive you!"

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

'Is the fire included?'

"A little baking soda will get rid of the smell.

An exaggeration of estate agents

'We can mortgage your future for a very attractive low interest rate.'

'It seems good, and he said the bit at the bottom is the name of the architect.'

'Floodplain close - House on stilts with ladder. Estate Agent saying, 'Welcome onto the property ladder...''

See the house whose property taxes were raised

'I think you'll all rest easy knowing this is a gated community!'

"This neighborhood has a strong sense of community that borders on siege mentality."

Couple wanting to buy the estate agents office.

'If you promise to never try to open the locked attic door, the owner will take $20,00 off!'

'Is there anything we can do to repay you other than to repay you?'

"I know the schools are great, but is this really the house we want to ride out the apocalypse in?"

'You're on the very bottom of the 'property ladder'. Or as we estate agents call it; 'the food chain'.'

Mortgages up 'Where?'

"The previous tenant has gone away for a very long time."

'A new concept. The inside out house.'

'And this is the sunken living room.'

'And every spring, a koi pond shows up in a corner of the basement.'

'You'll need to put these on before the inspection.'

'Mr. Jones? I've found a house that fits your funds perfectly! It even has a little garden!'

"I don't get it. How come it's so cheap?"

"It's true that the basement's flooded, but it's stocked."

A Wholly Owned Subsidiary of Uncle Sam.

'I'm positive that 'Open House' sign pointed to next door.'

"I want a reverse mortgage. Take me back to when I didn't have one."

Affordable homes coming soon - 'If they build these then our house will become affordable...!'

'The owners are prepared to accept any reasonable offer.'

'Are you sure now is the best time to buy an inflatable house?'