Homebound Artists Gifts

Lockdown

"I don't know, kids. I've been a stay-at-home dad for so long it just sort of... happened."

Four children playing the flute.

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

'I'm looking forward to parents' night. I'm going to ask these people their diet secrets.'

"Barlow, it's come to my attention that you've called in, 'Playing Possum' 8 days this month."

"I'll give you $5 for that shirt."

"'What I wanted to do, but could not, during my socially-distanced summer vacation this year'..."

'I suppose you realize that when I tell everyone back at the office about this you wont be able to tele-commute anymore.'

"Plagiarist!"

Keeping occupied in lockdown

Vincent Van Gogh's family reunion Family members with ears missing or bandaged up

"Bit big for a cherub, isn't it, Brother Ignatious?"

Attack Of The Guy From The Other Room

"I want to see it as art, but I keep asking myself 'is it really grocery?'"

'A frore basenji was mistaken for a stabile.'

World Championship Mime-Off -'HEYYY! He's in a REAL box!!'

'It's a girl and she's an artist in her gestational period.'

'Of course it's not signed. Writing hasn't been invented yet.'

'It wasn't until Picasso realzed he was earning $2,856 per hour that he began painting all night.'

Darwin's Evolving Statue.

"I #*#*#* hate gardening, I'd much rather be at work!!"

Last painting of a dog for 200 yd

Munch's 'Parents Being Asked For Money'.

Symbolism for Artists

"I suffer for my art..."

'Never say 'let's dye a hundred eggs'. You'll be eating your words for weeks.'

Alien Painting Moon

'Right now he's painting himself in a corner.'

Hedge Car

"Reminds me of that Claes Oldenburg sculpture we peed on in Chicago."

"No, that looks nothing like him. Were you even listening to me? Young man, are you on drugs?"

Save the tree.