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Couch and Potato

'Bad Day?'

'How's the water skiing?'

"I like New York, but I miss sleeping drunk on my front lawn."

'How should I know how things are at home, I moved into the pub a month ago.'

'Anything good on the telly tonight? Yes dear the vase!'

And so Bob's folks sent him off into the world. But not before running a few last tests, just to be sure he could handle it.

"You don't understand, Mom. Our staying in and watching TV is not the same as you and Dad staying home and watching TV in Dayton, Ohio."

"Great - really great - but I'd still like to get out of the house every once in a while."

The New Business Power Suit

'That's a full ten minutes with the TV off. What now?'

"I'm sort of hesitant to remind him that his work-from-home days are over starting Monday."

"The school district is great and I love the layout - I'm just not sure the mud is gooey enough."

The Insiders

'You can't imagine how happy we are to find a vet who makes house calls!'

Man with head in ground: 'I'm not burying my head in the sand, I'm doing the coal mining search myself.'

'Roger was home schooled, so it was only natural that he wound up working at home.'

Stay at Home Yellowstone.

'Back home, it's probably Happy Hour now!'

"I used to complain about being trapped in a cage, until he got his 250 premium channels."

'Why would I want an ocean-going yacht when I've got a rocking chair in my front porch?'

"Remember when we thought the pandemic was only going to last a couple of weeks."

'The good news is it's not mice.'

'It was designed for people who don't want any visitors.'

"Do you ever get off that branch?"

'He's still got his looks - good job I've got used to them.'

"It's the peacock-removal guy."

'We have your recliner. Don't call the cops. We'll be in touch!'

When they said more people were choosing to holiday at home I think they meant in the UK

"Let's go somewhere fun and not really experience it."

'I always drink from a travel mug at home. It makes me feel like I'm out of the house.'

Finding yourself

Lockdown goals

I'd rather be at home chewing on a bone

Stay at Home, Save Lives, Coronavirus.