Home Hack Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Your father'll do anything to avoid filling a few watering cans.'

'How do you like my new, deep plush carpet?'

'We've knocked out the interior walls to improve our home Wi-Fi coverage.'

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

A DIY disaster.

Instant Laundry Detergent, 'Just add water'.

"Want to impress me with that hammer? Try using it to fix a few things around here."

"The white flag means he gives up and will finally hire a professional to finish the renovation."

Your Home Remodel Team

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's pimping the wall!'

"It's a miracle I was able to build this desk all by myself. I'm not so handy."

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

'Have you got one of those things you use to knock nails in...?'

"I fixed your leaky tap and the oven door... but there's nothing I can do with that dodgy seal on the fridge!"

'I figure that if I sell just one, I can retire.'

Wallpapering with Nails

'Old mother hubbard -- your cupboard is now bare.'

"Was it a fuse?"

"When we remodeled, we decided to go with the granite countertop."

'I accidentally hacked into Mom's microwave oven.'

"I thought you were out front telling the fence company how to do their job."

"Never marry an engineer."

"The blow drier is broken."

Man falls through ceiling - 'Did you find the leak?'

"They've got insulation to die for!"

"Can't we just get some load-bearing wallpaper?"

House Painter gets stuck to the ceiling.

We don't have a budget to redo the last guy's business cards, door placard, and so on, so would you mind assuming his identity in the meantime?

"I've fixed the shelf, darling."

"Buying the largest TV on the market was a good idea. Mounting it was not."

"Larry does all his own stunts."

Translating Contractor to English

'I'll calk that hole as soon as the siege is over.'

DIY Shelves