Home Decorators Pillows

"It's just a lot yellower than we expected."

"You didn't. . . And I didn't! So who ordered a ten thousand gallon aquarium?"

Unfinished furniture.

'This chair ain't big enough for the both of us.'

The cushions are very soft !

'Look, you stay on your side of the bowl and I'll stay on mine!'

"The Lawsons got new furniture. They're having a 'Help Scratch It Up' party."

"I wish the government would speed up the conversion of this base to civilian use."

"I forget now, but one of these buttons opens the chair back to full recline."

"Wall to wall carpet. Shouldn't that be wall to wall to wall to wall carpet?"

'We live in a designer trainer.'

"We both love Chinese food."

'Just calm down Kitty, dear.'

"Ralph's totally useless as a husband, but he makes a great futon."

Sale. We need something that will meet our growing backsides.

"Why did we buy such huge furniture?"

"Oh, yeah, I took your special chair to 'Antique Roadshow.'"

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

'We had the baby's ultrasound photo made into wallpaper.'

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

Painting by the numbers for adults

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

Adhesive Tiles: Do Not Open from this End.

"Home depot."

Use your imagination.

Painting the Ceiling

'Frankly, I think watching paint dry has been given a bad press.'

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

"We made all the wheels out of old coffee tables and chandeliers."

"Careful with that - the wife made it at pottery class."