Artistic Home Decorator Pillows

'Ooh, a stairs! In case you ever want to walk upstairs. Such over indulgence and decadence! It's exquisite.'

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

Dog Hunting Trophies.

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

"I decided to go all out on the house decorations this year."

Adhesive Tiles: Do Not Open from this End.

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

"The painting and pillows were his idea. The scratches were mine."

'This plant which you brought to me from your office snubs all my other plants.'

Unfinished Funiture Store.

'This chair ain't big enough for the both of us.'

"Except for that wall socket, the whole damn thing is a trompe-l'oeil."

"Why does this curious plant of his always make me feel gigantic?"

I'm starting to think our new hardwood floor is made of driftwood.

Bird collecting furniture for it's home.

'Gerald was stripping some old wallpaper, and there it was - Leonard Da Vinci's lost fresco ‘The Battle of Anghiari'.'

Leda knew it was serious when the visited Ikea together.

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

'He keeps grounding out the energy flow.'

Man and woman buying furniture.

Two portraits kissing each other

Tedious Romantic.

'Eee,love - this place gives me a great idea for the spare bedroom!'

'Okay, kids...time for your bath.'

'And a special feature on this model is the diet ice cubes.'

"Not until you've arranged your pillows."

'You'll never get the Burgundy stain out, so let's just color the whole thing.'

Pollock Painting Company

'It's a coffee-book table.'

"How do you like my 'Pop art'?"