Home Critic Pillows

Laurel, would it be okay if I brought up a topic of conversation? Anything. I noticed some green stuff in your bathroom – I think it's mold. It happens. It's been weeks since you washed your dishes, and months for sheets and towels. And? There's a huge rodent on your head. It can eat the mold.

"I idolised him, then I saw his kitchen!"

Kritik's Korner

'I don't care what the blueprints say, I'm certain HE strongly suggested a roof.'

"Bob takes everything with a grain of salt...and pepper...and garlic..."

Preliminary Price Tag: $5,000,000,000

SF NO

'He's a blight on the whole neighbourhood.'

Town Planning Department

'Oh no. The building inspector. He's worse than the Pharaoh.'

"We'll always hate Paris."

'Hey, Frenchie - you call this paupiettes de beouf aux legumes?'

'I see the rebranded mobile methadone project got underway.'

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

'It's the council's flood defence system.'

'Corporations' studying a city for its 'pros' and 'cons'

'Henri! We found your sweatband!'

"The video of our wedding now includes commentary."

Teacher giving marks out of ten to builder repairing wall in school.

'Your childhood treehouse is where we will begin therapy....'

'He lives in a house, and it's by the side of the road, but he's still not a friend to man.'

Autumn Leaves

The Bob Dole Home-Shopping Network

'Eww, when did this building get that hideous gargoyle?'

"I should have known he has absolutely no morals - I've seen how he loads a dishwasher."

Gentrification vs Manchester...

'I hate bird watching in the city.'

"Dude, I don't mind watching your holiday video, but can you fast-forward it please..."

'Carrot cake!.. What's next?.. Broccoli cake?'

'We're going to need more money just to complete the model.'

"Ask not for whom the refrigerator hums..."

Road Construction Blues.

"Sometimes, on a clear day, you can actually see a tree..!"

'Hey, I enjoyed that meal. Did you get the caterers in, or something?'

'One thing about your salads, I learn a lot about insects. You forgot to wash the lettuce again!'