Home Café Creators Mugs

Self-Isolatteion

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

Nothing beats the love of a good cat.

"Who ordered the double chocolate parfait with a cherry on top?"

'Do you have any catsup?'

Today's special... donuts.

What nationality were your parents? North or south Poles?

Wasting away again in Cappuccinoville.

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

Hats and Food

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

Non-Power Breakfast

"Good morning Rudy. I suppose you're wondering why I've summond you....It's time for your annual performance review...."

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

"You sure you guys don't spike the coffee?"

"This place is famous for its short fiction about food."

"They say we destroy plants – such as potatoes, corn and carrots – and they're boycotting us. They're fruitarians."

'I put the cake in the blender because I wanted a glass of cake.'

National Coffee Day

Coffee

Tree Cafe; Free Valet Parking

"I've spent all night diluting our negative reviews on Yelp." "Really?" "Yeah. You know how you can usually tell when a business owner does that?" "They post 'reviews' that don't have even a hint of negativity." "Amateurs. Check out the negatives I include: 'House of Java Cafe. I hate it because it's so perfect, it makes the rest of my day feel inadequate.'"

"I'd say business was brisk."

"We're going to have to think outside the box to boost sales, minion."

Coffee Menu

The American Tearoom, Moscow