Holy Hackers Pillows

'You called for tech support?'

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

Golfing Bishop.

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

Gadget geek.

'WD-40 un-sticks things that should move and duct tape makes things that shouldn't move, stop.'

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

'Mark my word, Walters, this is no ordinary virus.'

"Careful! He knows computers."

"It's a fantastic computer! It's so old that none of today's hackers know how to hack it!"

'Here you are, Simmons!'

"I have an app for that."

"I think retrieving the info from that harddrive might be a little tricky."

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

The Ordered List

'I store all my data in the cloud.'

'I know that you think you should be the President of this company, Your Majesty. But, you'll just have to work your way up, like I did!'

"A hacker logged into my fitness tracker and stole all my steps."

'Gimme all your cache!'

"Tell me when it's all cyber warfare, and I'll enlist!"

'No wonder we're losing money! --This organizational chart is upside down!'

Proof of Being Human

The guy who took a wrong turn off the electronic superhighway and wound up in a microwave oven in Davenport, Iowa.

"I love these fitness bracelets! it's like having a tamagotchi, but the tamagotchi is you."

'What do you mean that you hacked into Old Faithful's computer so now it's not so faithful?'

Cyberwarfare

The mobile -priest was keen to use modern technology to 'keep in touch' with his parishioners!

Wikileaks

'Computer crime seems to be on the rise.'

Angels shopping in a store called "Heaven Pharmacy: Self-serve"

'Decoding is often 1, 14, 20, 9, 3, 12, 9, 13, 1, 3, 20, 9, 3.'

'He's determined to not pay for The Times online.'

"We're very proud. His classmates voted most to hack into a foreign computer system."

"We know you have better treats than raisins...we hacked your supermarket loyalty card."

"Remember when they used to call it the 'private sector?'"