Hollywood Satirist Gifts

24 ? The Next Series. Jack says: 'Think I'll throw a sickie today.'

'Homeless in Hollywood'

"Could we make this a little more derivative."

For richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health for a full 13 episodes...?

"That movie was released in 2015. It might be time for a reboot."

The Pitch and the Pendulum.

People magazine decides on its most popular cover ever - Brad and Angelina juggling the octuplets.

Kate Beckinsale

Kevin Bacon

"If we put barcodes on the actresses it's easier to keep to their sell by dates!"

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

"Gee, thanks pal."

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

Welcome to Mauritius Home of the Dodo Burger

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

"I see the White House didn't lower the flag to half staff."

'He doesn't like people walking in - try crawling.'

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

'I don't think the employees like me.'

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."

Looks Like They're Finally Renovating The Toilet

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

Michael Jackson - Mission fulfilled.

German School

Bank P45's - 'Cashier number 5 please.'

"What are you doing?"

Plight of Decent-White-Male-Middle Class Scapgoats.