Holiday Season For Pets Gifts

"...do they teach manners at obedience school?"

Where your mind & battle are los

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

"First class, or with children?"

"Hawaii, where are you folks going?"

"I know I'm a little early, but sometimes I need a break from that dreadfully cold weather."

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

"That's it lads, 364 days annual leave...what would we have done without our union!"

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

"See? And you said you couldn't work from home."

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

"Ninja bread men"

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

Retirement homes' 'pill fight'.

Tourists and their Pets.

'You can forget the Captain's table-we're not paying that kind of money just to eat with the crew!'

'How very Cumbria.'

'Sir, will that be business or first class?'

Non-Denominational Carols

'Lining my pockets with aluminum foil so I can sneak Thanksgiving leftovers home.'

'Now it fits.'

Christmas Pets

"I can hardly wait...TWO WHOLE weeks without having to deal with mindless e-mails, incessant interruptions, boring meetings...."

* Let's stop here, they seem nice!

Panettone

'Thanksgiving's no holiday for turkeys or the women who cook them.'

Dog wearing a cone

"'How We Die' - fabulous!"

Frank & Ernie's Diner. Today: Yogurt Surprise. We call it "yogurt surprise" because we couldn't read the expiration date on the carton.

"So last Christmas it was those Cabbage Patch Kids."

'Do I get to take an 'elfie' with Santa, too?'