Holiday Mixer T-Shirts

"Mr. Levine, may I see you a moment?"

"Guess who brought king cake!"

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

Get your no-turkey recipes here! Eco club. Go veggie for T-day! No thanks! I like turkey, sausage, stuffing, creamed onions with bacon and mincemeat pie. I figured as much. How can you tell? Gut check. That's my gut reaction, too.

Camping-Pong

It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas

'See you in two weeks!'

"Pepperoni pizza is my favorite! Ah, Billy, you little suck up!"

Violin family at Christmas

"Actually, it wasn't so bad. One minute I was standing in line at the slaughterhouse...The next thing I knew, I was being basted in my own juices..."

'Research shows that while the number of surfers is somewhat constant over the year, there is a sudden increase in casual bathers over Summer...'

Hanukkah tree

Start the session by doing something unusual.

'How will my turkey turn out this year?' Color

"For keyhole turkey carving we use a 12 mm port in each flank and third in the midline."

Thru The Eyes Of A Lifeguard.

Nocturne

"Thar be an Hallowe'easter a blowin'."

A pilgrim driving a camper leaving the Mayflower ship.

Meat Poultry Fish. Genetically Modified Christmas Turkeys. Order Now. They inserted kangaroo DNA to make a product for stuffing, and octopus DNA so everybody gets a drumstick!

Blowing out the Christmas Pudding.

"Find out who's on vacation and then add this stuff to the workload on his desk."

Now Playing: Christmas ? The Ultimate feel-Good Musical!

"Too much salt?! Hey, I put a lot of sweat and tears into making that Christmas Pudding!"

What will I do with it? It will never fit in the microwave.

Huge Christmas Pudding

Monday. Grab what you can for dinner. I'm shopping for Thanksgiving! Tuesday. I didn't pack your lunches. I'm fixing cranberry relish. Wednesday. Shoo! I'm making the pies! I know how the pilgrims felt. I'm starving!

"I manage to avoid jetlag by just catching an earlier flight..."

Kringle: The Decca Years

Santana Claus

'Wear them on thanksgiving instead.'

'I vote we throw caution to the wind.'

Carolling

Thoughtful kiddies' midnight snacks overtax my bulging slacks … The load I haul back to my shack is bigger than the one I packed.

'I'll celebrate Christmas in a supermarket and you?'