Holiday Gift Seeker T-Shirts

'Impressive screen, but doesn't it put you off your tea?'

"I don't know why you always have to choose the same hide-and-go-seek hiding spot that I do, Tommy!"

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

"That'll be five bucks."

God putting the finishing touches to the Pug.

'All I want for Valentine's Day is a Greek fisherman's cap.'

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

Easter Island Cheeseheads

Ball as water-melon.

A watch face with Stonehenge

'It's another corporate lawyer...do we want to buy a soul?'

Ice Skater

T-Rex Game of Choice - Ping Pong

"I always end up buying way more black-truffle honey than I intended."

Customer entering bank that is touting number of toasters given away

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

"I might just get a pie."

"Waiter, this is the worst meal I've ever tasted. And believe me, I've eaten some crap!"

Where Deviled Eggs come from

"Not much in the way of loot, but we got a ton of store credit."

Snowman

"What if the cat stuck in the tree has a gun? Is that an emergency?"

"Roadkill cookies"

Santa's Helpers

A baby using a heavy duty drill

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

"Pass that."

International House of Excrement

Just one more choccy...

Regifts of the Magi

Happy Bifurcation Day,

"What seems to be the problem?"