Hoedown Hero T-Shirts

'I guess that's what you would call a square dance caller collar.'

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

Use the body brush vigorously - he will enjoy it.

Two old superheroes on a park bench feeding the birds.

"'What I wanted to do, but could not, during my socially-distanced summer vacation this year'..."

'What did I SAY to DAVE?' - A person with hangover worrying about the night before.

'I drank 10 pints of rum.'

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."

"Fire one shot if you find a waterhole or two for a coffeeshop."

'I'm just curious, which one of you was dropped off by their boyfriend on a really fast motorcycle?'

Cleaning Lockers.

"Yes, the migration flight home is always faster, but it's thanks to the prevailing winds, not just because we're keen to get home..."

'I'm racing him in the 4.30.'

"Sosa's great, but McGwire is my hero."

I'm going to hate myself in the morning, but I hate everything in the morning.

'My new year's resolution is to stay home next new year's eve.'

"Uggh! Who am I?" 'Rory Bremner wakes up with a hangover'

'I'm sure we'll hear about his hole-in-one!'

'I am glad I never caught any rabbits! I've been living off the royalties ever since!'

"Good news, you are virus free and should be able to resume hitting each other in the heads as hard as possible this fall."

"He's at that funny age. It takes twice as long to get over a good time, as to have it."

'Sixteen home runs, 34 runs batted in, and nine stolen bases. I'd call that being good.'

Two hoses, one labeled 'H2' and the other '0'.

Two boys having a water fight.

Princess Anne

Nelly Copter

'zzz... nyarrrgh... fwa... ...ack... k... na...graa...' - '' - 'I just had the worst dream...' - '' - 'Oh, b***ocks.' - ''

Surgeons high-five spectators as they enter emergency room.

'Monday morning is the new Friday night.'

"It's all right for you, my job sucks."

'Mom! Can my role model stay for dinner? He's suspended for three games and has nowhere to go.'

The Zealous Huntsman

'What's your best seller?'

'I don't mind hand-me-downs. I just wish my brother had played football.'

"No thanks. Our ducks have already been cleaned."